It is an area often neglected, especially when it comes to information about BDSM. Yet it is also one of the most important, especially in the Maledom/femsub BDSM dynamic. It can also be the source of many misunderstandings.
Mistake #1
Many dominant men truly struggle with the question “how do I give my 24/7 slave something to do” Many resort to household duties, in an attempt to achieve this. Although usually well meant, this is just about the biggest mistake you can make.
Household chores is what most women do most of the time. So there is no attraction, hence no incentive.
It doesn’t make her “feel slave” at all. It makes her feel like most other women, i.e. not different, not special.
Now that does not mean you cannot use household duties. You can, but you will have think different. Elsewhere in this section we will help you with this.
The $100,000 question: why put your slave to work? what’s the point?
This entire section is for those who are, or want to be, in some form of a 24/7 BDSM relationship. In other words, a relationship that encompasses more than the occasional kinky adventure. Of course, there is nothing wrong with the latter, but this section id all about 24/7 relationships and their dynamics, which are very different.
The number 1 danger in a 24/7 relationship are boredom and routine. This is the result of repetition of the same elements over and over again and that in turn is a the result of the fact that the number of things you can do is usually limited. Limited by real life, by your personal circumstances, kids, work, your mother in law, physical and mental possibilities and inspiration.
Giving her a job to do (or more) will help you break the vicious cycle of repetition. And there are many options. Not all of them have to be specific “jobs”. They can also be behavior patterns, temporary tasks, living conditions or forms of training for example.
The idea is that you take her out of the ordinary, daily routine and into the exciting life of being (and feeling) a slave. However, here too, avoiding an overdose of routine and repetition is the secret to success.
The critical success factors for every slave job
Regardless what the job is and what its specifics are, there are a few critical success factors:
• Be specific! Make clear what the job exactly is and what it is you want her to do.
• Set goals! Make very clear what it you want her to do and how well or how quick you want her to do it.
• Be demanding! Make sure it will really take (some) effort on her part. Things shouldn’t be too easy.
• Be realistic! Don’t set yourself (and your slave) up for failure – make sure, whatever the job is, it can be done (maybe with some effort, adaption and creativity)
• Set both rewards and punishments Make clear what both success and failure to comply will bring her. And make sure a punishment is a punishment (i.e. not some spanking that she actually …considers to be fun)
• Be strict! Once the job is “on” do not accept anything other than compliance and success
• Check up! She needs to feel that this is important to you, so check regularly, ask, demand demonstrations, et cetera.
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The above article is a reprint from our information/educational site Kink Culture.
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