Like a martial art Shibari requires some preparation. However, in this case these preparations are the first steps on your stairway. First of all: you need time and you don’t want to be disturbed. Unplug or switch off your phone (or switch on the answering machine) and make it something special.

An exotic, sensual adventure.

Your scene is probably going to take quite some time so preparing something to eat and drink is not just a luxury. Turn it into a picnic if you like. And since you are in a Japanese mood anyway, why not go out and buy some Sushi or Sashimi (Japanese raw fish / raw meat snacks).

Refrain from alcohol (and recreational drugs).

If you want to be in style Chinese tea will do fine and so will fruit juice. But softdrinks or mineral water are just as good as long as they do not contain gas. Ideally the giver should make sure there are a few bottles of an isotonic drink around (Gatorade for example) as well as some sweets (chocolate will do fine) or sugar lumbs or a banana.

Especially if your scene is going to be a long one (and it very likely will be a long one) your partner and yourself will need nutrients and liquid to avoid dehydration and cramp and – for the giver – lack of concentration. Emotional scenes DO dehydrate the body, actually quite rapidly, and lack of food and liquid may cause cramps, nausea or fainting and in general just ruins your fun and your scene. So do make sure both of you are taken well care of in this area as well. Lack of food will acidify muscles (what sportspeople will feel as “muscles filling up”), a process that happens very rapidly and instantly. This effect is a sure show stopper and a complete turn off. Providing a bit of food (one bonbon or sugar lumb and a few sips every half our or so) will prevent this from happening, will enhance the recipient’s stamina dramatically and will help you to enjoy a long, highly sensual and very erotic session.

You need to plan your bondage, especially if you are inexperienced. It helps if you make some kind of sketch or use a picture as an example. Your ropes should be ready at hand and pay attention to the temperature in the room. It should not be to cold, because your partner will be there (naked and unable to move around) for a couple of hours.

Next: every Japanese erotic scene starts with bathing. If you have a bath, have one together, but a shower will do just as fine. Wash and relax each other. This is important to get in the mood. A nice, slow erotic massage is the next step. This warms up your partners’ muscles and relaxes the body. Getting in the mood and warming up is essential (and it is a lot of fun).

Ropes

Shibari bondages are almost always done with rope, as opposed to the Western bondage culture, that often incorporates cuffs and belts. Experienced Nawashi use different ropes (rough and soft ones).

if this is new to you, stick to the soft ones. You need a set of different ropes. The basic set you need for the bondages in this level is:
five 3 MM diameter ropes (0.15 inch), each about a yard (meter) long (used for binding nipples, for some intersections and for hair-bondages);

seven 6 to 8 MM (approx. 0.2 – 0.3 inch) diameter ropes, each about four yards/meter long (most frequently used) – the dimensions of these ropes may vary based on individual physique. To measure, make sure you are able to wrap one of these ropes three times around your partners’ torso, just above the breasts, leaving suffient room to tie a knot;

one 6 to 8 MM (approx. 0.2 – 0.3 inch) diameter rope, about 10 yards/meter long, used for body harnasses:

five 10 to 12 MM (0.5 inch) diameter ropes, each about four yards/meter long (used for stabilisation) – in individual cases take a lengths of FOUR torso wraps.

In the event your partrner falls into the BBW-category, both for aesthetical reasons as well as from a safety point of view you may want to use slightly thicker ropes. If there is more body, thin rope will very quickly look VERY thin and your partner will look like a fish, entangled in the fishing line rather then a person, beautifully wrapped in a bondage, which is not what you want.

Next to that, it will be impossible to get the pressure right with ropes that are too thin (either the ropes will not do anything at all, or they will cut into the flesh painfully instead of producing erotic stimuation). Using colored ropes from an aesthetical point of view, usually works better on BBW’s.

If you mark the different types of rope by tipping the end in different colors of paint you won’t have any trouble picking the right one when you need it. Reserve your ropes for bondage only and take good care of them. If any of the ropes gets damaged even in the slightest way, replace it so you know your partner will be safe.

The basics of all bondages

There are probably several hundreds of different bondages and we cannot describe them all here. Once you get into it, your own creativity will guide you as long as you understand the basics. We will give several examples of bondages and we will tell you about the erotics zones and how the tension of the ropes and the knots do their job. Always use a so called “reef knot” they feel good on the body, are easy to untie (even under tension) and will not deform.

Every Shibari bondage session is built up in several layers and is built up one layer at the time. Take your time between the different layers. Let your partner get used to the feeling. By now you will probably understand why you work with different short ropes instead of one long one: it makes life easy and it allows you to adjust the bondage without having to untie and retie the whole thing. You will notice that adjustment is necessary. Your partner will ask for more tension as times goes on. That is because the erotic stimulation builds up over time and she will want more and more of it.

Be aware not to block any veins. You will notice that tightness is not the issue here. It is about tension and carefully applied pressure, but the ropes should never be extremely tight. There is no need for that, it is counter-productive and the tension will built up especially when you suspend your partner.

The above article is a reprint from our information/educational site Kink Culture.
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