Fan Letter Of The Week:
Hi Kiko,
My name is Ravi.I’m an Indian. I browsed Y’r site and came to know what Kamasutra is. I Have some questions which i wish to clarify from U 1) When guy puts his cock inside of girls pussy then would it really make the girl to fall in deep sex? 2) When girl sucking the cock will she fell any desire inside of her and what is the position of Guy by that time? 3) Is masturbation Bad for Health? I like Masturbing quite often. I don’t have girl friends!! I love sex the most!! I usually do masturabation while seeking sexy movies or when looking sexy pictures. I do every night before sleep. 4) Do Frequent Masturbation makes the IQ bad? Will it hurt in future when he get married? I’m not married yet! so will it effect me during sex with my wife in future. Pl give me suffcient information and tell me more about masturbation and its drawbacks if any!!
Thanks Ravi.

THIS is TRUE by Randy Cassingham

NOT WHAT IT’S CRACKED UP TO BE: Brose Gearhart of Saugerties, N.Y., has been convicted of felony possession of crack cocaine with intent to sell. Police say he retailed $1,000 of crack per week from his home. “I’ve got nothing to say, I guess,” he told the judge, who sentenced Gearhart to 1-1/3 to 4 years in state prison. Gearhart’s live-in girlfriend, Debra Bailey, 43, was convicted of similar charges and sentenced to 4-1/2 to 9 years in prison. The day after sentencing, Gearhart turned 90 years old. (AP) …He’s sentenced to a term of four percent of his life while his girlfriend gets five times as much? Senior Citizen Discounts are going too far! GOLDEN YEARS II: Forrest Silva Tucker has been arrested. Again. In trouble with the law since he was 15, Tucker was busted in Florida after a bank robbery in Pompano Beach. Tucker, 78 years old, led police on a high-speed chase before crashing into a tree. Police found $5,500 in cash from the robbery, a gun, and two stocking masks in his car. Investigators then discovered that Tucker is wanted for escaping from San Quentin prison 20 years ago — one of his 18 jail and prison escapes — and is reputed to be the leader of the “Over the Hill Gang”, a group of retirement-age robbers. “Potentially he’s America’s oldest bank robber,” a Broward County Sheriff’s Office spokesman told reporters. (AP) …Wow: even career criminals get to retire to Florida.

PLEDGE NIGHT: Strippers were hired to perform for 55 members and pledges of a Delta Chi fraternity at the University of Florida at a recent initiation rite. After one of the women said she was molested, campus police say they found video tapes showing numerous members and pledges having sex with the strippers “and with one another” at the party. But because the female victim allegedly used so much alcohol and amphetamines during the incident, the evidence “simply cannot sustain a sexual assault charge,” says state attorney Rod Smith. However, since the tapes show the frat members giving the women money after having sex with them, he says the fraternity will be charged with operating a brothel. (Reuters) …The bad news: we don’t believe you about the charge. The good news: we decided not to charge you with prostitution.

LONGSHOT: Natalie Gifford, 31, admits she smoked pot, snorted cocaine and drank beer before getting in her car and crashing into a woman in Gainesville, Fla., causing the woman “permanent injuries.” But Gifford rejected a plea bargain that called for a 10-day jail sentence. After a full trial, Gifford’s driving license was revoked permanently, and she was given a six year prison term. (UPI) …To err is human; to try to get away with it when caught red-handed is ridiculous.

LEASH LAW: The Cecil County (Md.) Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals has asked local officials to make it illegal for dogs to ride in the back of pickup trucks because they might injure themselves by jumping out of the moving vehicles. Gene Howell, 75, says such a law would mean he wouldn’t have room for everyone in the cab in his truck. “I suppose what I could do is have my wife ride there in the back and let the dog ride up front with me,” he says. “‘Course, I don’t know that my wife would stay back there like the dog does. The dog is trained.” (Reuters) …He probably has a better collar and fur coat, too.

GOING ONCE, GOING TWICE, SOLD! Andrew Tyler of Haddonfield, N.J., really likes eBay, an Internet auction site. He didn’t win the auction of the Van Gogh, but he did successfully bid $23,000 for a 1955 Ford convertible, $24,500 for a 1971 Corvette, and $400,000 for a bedroom suite that belonged to Canada’s first prime minister, Sir John A. Macdonald. His bids totaled $2.8 million, and boy are his parents mad. Andrew is only 13 years old, so his successful bids have been invalidated, and he’s not allowed to get on the Internet anymore. (UPI) …There’s always the Home Shopping Channel.

AUCTION ACTION II: A team of 16 high-tech workers, including managers, engineers and programmers, have withdrawn themselves from auction on the eBay Internet auction site. The Silicon Valley-based group had placed themselves for “sale” to the highest bidder. The quoted minimum price of $3.14 million included salaries, signing bonuses, and stock options. “The seller ended the auction. He did not give a reason when we talked to him,” said an eBay spokesman. (AP) …They just didn’t want to work for a 13-year-old kid.

FASHION POLICE: After the Columbine High School shooting in Colorado, a poll found that 40 percent of U.S. high school students, and 49 percent of their parents, say a deadly attack by angry students “could take place” at their school. Meanwhile, schools around the nation, partly in response to President Clinton’s idea that schools should require uniforms or other “non-provocative dress” codes in order to solve “this whole black trench coat deal”, have taken steps to ban students from wearing trench coats, as the Colorado shooters liked to wear. Students in Colorado, Missouri, Maine, Florida and Indiana have been suspended or sent home for wearing trench coats to school. (various) …Thus singling out and humiliating kids who may not have other coats and starting the cycle anew.

LET HE WHO HATH NO TRAFFIC VIOLATIONS CAST THE FIRST STONE: “Christian Cars Stoned in Nazareth” — AP headline

QUESTION OF THE WEEK: Lydia in New Zealand asks, “Do the Honorary Unsubs you write depress you? I grew up (in Florida) watching Senior Wences on TV, and was both happy to hear he grew so old, and sad that he’s now gone. Thank you for remembering him!” I too sometimes feel sad about them, but no, they don’t depress me. If anything depresses me, it’s that these great men and women were often forgotten before they died. And what amazes me is how many of these incredibly talented people were born in Germany and fled because they were Jews and saw that the Third Reich wasn’t the kind of government they could live under (though I often don’t mention that aspect when I write the HUs). Just how much has Germany suffered over the last 50 years because of state-sponsored bigotry?! Their loss was often to the incredible gain of other countries, especially the U.S. (Schawlow, honored below, was born in the U.S., in case you wondered!) The archives of HUs on my web site has been updated: they start at http://www.thisistrue.com/honor.html

THIS WEEK’S HONORARY UNSUBSCRIBE goes to Arthur Schawlow. A physicist, Schawlow designed the Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation — the laser — with Dr. Charles H. Townes, based on Towne’s earlier microwave amplifier, the maser. Schawlow’s breakthrough, an “echo chamber” for light based on an artificial ruby, was the key. Townes and Schawlow, working in Townes’ lab at Columbia University (though Schawlow actually worked for Bell Labs), published their work in 1958. The first working device sprang to light on May 16, 1960, in Malibu, Calif. Schawlow shared the 1981 Nobel Prize in Physics for contributions to the development of laser spectroscopy. He died April 28 in Palo Alto, Calif., from congestive heart failure, a complication of leukemia. He was 77.

Joke of the Week
Martha Stewart Loving Perfect Sex! It’s a good thing……A really goooooood thing! She helped you plan the perfect wedding–now let her help you consummate it! In this handsome volume, Martha Stewart shows you how to transform a humdrum sex life into a smorgasbord of erotic possibility using everyday household items and fresh, seasonal ingredients. Guided by Martha’s helpful illustrations and instructions “any idiot could follow,” you’ll soon be molding and casting festive chocolate sexual aids, candy-coating and monogramming your birth control pills, or whittling a phallic latticework of your own design onto a swishy birch rod. You’ll get recipes for delicious, low-fat edible undergarments, Martha’s “Quickie” Blender Spanish Fly (fennel is the secret ingredient!) and a selection of sweet and savory hypo-allergenic genital toppings. Home video buffs will appreciate Martha’s tips on proper lighting, pacing, and mise-en-scene. And in the chapter on entertaining, you’ll find detailed instructions for planning an intimate menage-à-trois, a neighborhood wife-swapping party–even a full-blown Roman orgy! Now that’s living! Illustrations: Quilted Penis Cozy; Yuletide Tinsel-And-Holly Handcuffs; 12-Grain Erotic Muffins Quotes from Martha Stewart’s Loving: “No sexual encounter is complete without a hand-dipped post-coital mint…” p.24 “For sensitivity and tensile strength, nothing beats a good old fashioned hand-knotted condom made of fresh lamb entrails…” p.105 If your sexual partners spend time on their hands and knees–as mine do–you’ll find that strategically-placed, hand-woven Bhutanese runners can prevent chafing while simultaneously reducing wear-and-tear on the carpeting.”