Commentaries from the Dungeon Master of Blackthorne Manor, where any who seek ritual pain, rare exotic pleasures, or cathartic punishment will find a Welcome. The entire household of the Earl from the Lady Eleanor to the scullery maids, are devoted to pleasure, healing and enlightenment through the corporeal arts.

I was talking to a lad one day who had no trouble meeting women, but really wanted a “play partner”.  His complaint was that as soon as he pulled out his floggers his dates would get cold and distant, then leave soon after.  None, apparently, were able to recall their telephone number just then.

Now, it is a fact that many of the people that I have played with were not “in the scene” when I first met them. However, for those who had an interest it was easy for us to communicate our mutual curiosity without being too obvious about our negotiations. Thus, either of us would be able to back out without anything being said that might later be a matter of regret.

For example, a provocative, bratty attitude on the part of your new love may be the consequence of poor upbringing, or it may be an opening move.  Do not get exasperated; stay calm and centered, and suggest that “there would seem to be a public spanking about to happen here very soon”.  Watch her eyes.   Do you detect a gleam, instantly repressed, perhaps?

Later, half-undressed, poised in those numinous moments between suggestion and consummation, pleasure one nipple and gently but insistently apply pressure to the other between finger and thumb. Is she open to the conflicting sensations, uncertain perhaps, yet allowing herself to explore the experience and her reaction to it?

When lust engages and engulfs, when hormones and exercise have opened the doors of intimacy, try shielding her sight with a hand over her eyes.  Pin her wrist to the pillow with the other hand, restrain her with one leg artfully cast over her body with your knee placed precisely where she can rub her most erogenous zone against it to best effect.

Once the earthquake has subsided and Pussy has been rekindled with sweet kisses and licks, flip her over and initiate a private preview of the public discipline alluded to earlier.  Lightly spank the underside of her delicious buttocks, the “sweet spot”.  You may well be encouraged to continue, and are thus well on your way to a satisfying BDSM relationship, without questions that may trigger automatic denial, without setting out scary toys that provoke anxiety and doubt about your intentions, without making it all seem like a set-up.

When approached in this way, any inclination that a shy partner may have towards sexual exploration will be encouraged. By taking the lead in a manner that offers her interesting alternatives yet always gives her control over her situation, you will arouse her curiosity as to what else you have to offer and reassure her that you are someone to play with, not someone to be afraid of.

See you at the next party ?
Simon Blackthorn.