Joke of the Week
Three mice were sitting at a bar talking about how tough they were. The first mouse slams a shot and says, “I play with mouse traps for fun. I’ll run into one on purpose and as it is closing on me, I grab the bar and bench press it 20 to 30 times.” And, with that, he slams another shot. The second mouse slams a shot and says, “That’s nothing. I take those poison bait tablets, cut them up, and snort them, just for the fun of it.”

And, with that, he slams another shot. The third mouse slams a shot, gets up, and walks away. The first two mice look at each other, then turn to the third mouse and ask, “Where the hell are you going?”

The third mouse stops and replies, “I’m going home to fuck the cat.”

FAN LETTER OF THE WEEK:

Hi Dear Kiko,
So what would you like? How about a story for starters, Imagine a candle lit room with incense where the lighting is low and the music is soft. There is a bottle of scented warm rubbing oil on the table awaiting to bathe you. I am Staring deeply into your eye’s while I am slowly undressing you absorbing all the beauty that is before me. As the fickler of the candle light exposes the sensuality of your body. Deeply and tenderly I start to slowly kiss you. Circling my tongue around you wet moist lips until the passion grows and the kisses become intense, as my hands explore and my body responds to yours in sink. I start to slowly remove each Item of my clothes to let you see all of what I have to offer. While the moment is still, I grab your hand and lead you into the show where I begin to bath you. Slowly and gently I wash every inch of you making sure there is nothing left to bath. I gently position myself behind you as I kiss you neck and press my body up tightly against yours. I reach around you with soap in my hands and begin to caress you. As my hands explore you cupping your firm breast and folding your nipples. Slowly I reach down and slip my hand down the front of you placing my middle finder between you lips and resting the other two on the outside applying pressure to intensify the feeling. I slowly begin to explore your clit until I can feel the fold where your most sensitive spot is. From behind you, you can feel the pulsation of my heart and the strength of my erection. I begin to gently but firmly nibble and kiss your neck and shoulders. Working my way down to your beautiful checks as I turn you, leaning you against the wall. Spreading your legs I begin to nibble on your thighs working my way up to your lips.

Slowly I unfold them with my tongue kissing and sucking on them. I circle your clit tasking you warm and moist juices, taking my hands and spread your lips reveal there precious constants. My tongue begins to probe deep inside you as my fingers apply pressure to your anal zones. Gently I kiss and suck your clit applying more pressure pulling it between my teeth as my hands fold your nipple until you cum intensely. Then taken a towel, I dry you off still kissing and exploring every inch of you Leading you into the bedroom, the sent of incense form the candles is now strong in the room. I take the warm oil and begin to apply it to your body. I start with your neck rubbing and needing both sides and applying pressure to the center with my two thumbs. I work my way down to your shoulders applying deep but gentle pressure to relieve all that pressure from the day. I start to rub between your shoulder blades feeling your spine and needing between the muscles. As I am doing this, I am gently kissing and nibbling on your neck and back., I slowly work my way down to the small of your back and take my powerful hands and spread them across to your sides applying pressure to the middle with my thumbs. I start kissing, licking, and nibbling your beautiful cheeks. Your can feel the hot flavor cinnamon scented oil at this time tantalizing and tingling your skin. placing both hands around of your beautiful thigh and I begin to message it working my way down with my tongue and hands to your feet not missing any craves or part.

When I reach your foot I take it in both hands placing both thumbs in the small of your foot and message all the way up between your toes. As you feel the warm sensation of the hot oil. I repeat this staring with your other foot and work my way back up to your other thigh continuously and purposely just touching the out lips of your love zone. I can smell the sweet sent of your love juices and As I spread your lips and begin to drink it. I tease you by just letting my tongue search you lips and clit but not really applying any pressure. Then I move my way up to your breast stopping for a few minuets to explore you belly but ton to probe suck and kiss it. Gently working my way up to your breast. I circle your nipples with my wet tongue an blow gently over them to send an ice cool chill through them. Then sitting up I take some oil and pour it down the front of you. I begin to spread it firmly and taking both hands I cup each of your breast and firmly hold them. Using my thumbs and for fingers, I squeeze them bringing lifting my hands to finish the extension by bring your nipples to a point. Then I spread the oil up your neck messaging every beautiful curve.

I lay gently down on the right side of you place my left hand underneath your head to grasp your left breast. I take my right hand and cup your right breast and start kissing and liking while I message the other with my left hand. Slowly I move my right hand down the front of you and place it between your thighs until I feel your moist lips. I spread your lips and probe them until I feel a rise in you and you begin to moan. I continue to probe until I can feel the hood over your swollen clit and I expose your most sensitive spot. I place the tip of my finger into your clit and begin to rub it gently as I suck and caress your breast. As the passion rises in you, I take my left hand and place it under you and slide my thumb into you deep and probe until I find your swollen G spot. With my other hand I apply more pressure and increase my tempo. As I feel you coming, and I continue unmercifully to you beg me to stop. Resting for a moment. I place my legs between yours to apply pressure to your lips as nibble on you neck and kiss you passionately. When you have rested for a while, I position myself on top of you shifting my weight to my elbows. Slowly I spread your legs and take the head of my dick and rub it between your lips. I start to insert my large head and I can feel the warmth of your juices lubricating it. I slowly insert it a little at a time always fully removing it and plunging deeper Until I am all the way in you.

I can feel all of you as I rotate my hips and drive deeper and deeper. At the same time I begin to nibble and kiss your nipples. As the intensity climbs, I stop for a moment and place you on top of me in a sitting position. I lean you back Until you support yourself with your arms. I probe deep inside you to find your G spot. I then take some oil and rub it on your chest and begin to message your erect nipples as our hips grind together. When the intensity elevates between use. I take my right hand and place it between your lips and start rubbing your clit. After a while I take you and place you on your knees and insert my erection deep inside you. I lean forward and start kissing and nibbling your neck, back and ears while my other hand caresses your nipples. I let you control the tempo and rhythm until we both exploded in ecstasy. Slowly we lay on our sides with me still in you where you can feel my whole body behind you as I rap my arms around you. Well Until Another story that is all. Oh and by the way, That was not the end of it, just the start of it!!!!!!!!!!

Well a little about myself. I am 5’11″ tall and weigh 185lbs. I workout five times a week and have an athletic build. As you can see, I love to please and be pleased. But I get more out of giving than receiving. I work for the government as an industrial Engineer developing weapons. I love nature and learn new things. My characteristic traits are, passionate, affectionate, discrete, honest and communicative. I am clean and drug, desease, and acohol free. About five years ago I dated a lady that was BI sexual. She had a steady girl friend and they both wanted a male friend. At first it was hard, and I don’t mean the other way. But I learned a lot and they taught me how to make love to them and how to know when to be gentle and when to be forceful. I guess you could say they taught me how to make love like a lady would to another lady. How to use my body to provoke someone else’s. But all things must come to an end and we all split up. Unfortunately this left a big void. For years I have been searching for a lady who would love to be fulfilled in every way possible. This might never happen, but until then I want to please because this is what it is all about. I hope someday to marry such a lady and share everything with her. Why am I telling you this, I don’t know, but maybe it will give you a better idea of who I am. I have learned that the women is the teacher and the man is the pupil. Everybody is different and they like different things. It is exciting when you first meet someone and explore each other, weather in a group or just the two of you. But the truth is, that two people can never really know how to please on another, if they have never been with each other. The only way this can happen, is if they can communicate well. First step is this letter and I hope you enjoyed my story. There are a lot more to come if you like. If not, thanks anyway and hope you have fun. I am not a hunk, but neither am I a dog either. I am not the biggest Dick! in town, but I know how to use what I have. I am between 7! to 8 inches long. And I am not measuring this from between my balls either. I am approximately 1-1/2 to 1-3/4 inch Diameter. I am enclosing a photo of my self. It is not that explicit yet. If I get to know you better I will send a very explicit one (see all). Well have a great day and hope to hear from you very soon. Best George PS: I am not very good at writing stories like this either. But I gave it my best shot. It is my first story I have ever wrote. So please take it easy on me. I usually tell the lady a story or fantasy while I am make love to her!!!